worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
