Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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