what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
