so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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