Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
