Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Text me some of your sweat
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