dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
