my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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