I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
