Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
