he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
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