Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
