I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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