I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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