I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
