they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
