Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
