if i can run in heels then i can drive
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
How external is "for external use only"?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
