I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize
