these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Can you bring me the toilet please
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
