found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Randomize
