apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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