is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
This toilet bowl is my home.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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