she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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