And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
The feeling are messing with the penis
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
