Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Randomize
