dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
