i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
If its not for food we ain't going out.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
