when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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