RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
