Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
