If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
