would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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