ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
