Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
