I think my fart just growled at me.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
