she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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