i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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