I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
