Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
