is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
