bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
