Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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