She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
