I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
