we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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