just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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