is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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