he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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