Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
