Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
