Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Randomize
